Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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