fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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