bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize