Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
