Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
