Who did Billy Mays play for?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
