Just fell off a train. Bad.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize