Umm I'm too high to move.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
