I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
My life is pants optional.
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