U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
