So drunk its hurt
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
