If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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