HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
