i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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