I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize