i don't like sucking hair
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
