mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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