The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
