How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
