apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
handjob tips. give me some.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
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and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
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So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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