all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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