Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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