Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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