That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
where does the pee come out of this thing
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
