we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
