it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I am naked and annoyed.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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