So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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