idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
God, you're like boner-b-gone
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
