Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I am midnight drunk by noon
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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