He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
