If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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