Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I wish I could punch you in the face.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face

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(647): View more from Ontario

TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes

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(253): View more from Washington

dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?

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(304): View more from West Virginia

NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.

(1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

the essentials, lol

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