Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Randomize
