Only a mothe r could love this liver
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
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