he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
