I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
My cat gives me a boner
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
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In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
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That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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