well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
