i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
