Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
