Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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