We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
