it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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