just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Randomize
