remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
