nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize