i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
