Quick, to the slutcave!
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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