My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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