Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
