so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
