she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.