Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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